Three Principles to Assist Your Parenting Mindset
How much proactive thinking do you give to your parenting? Are you more of a reactionary
parent, or do you implement routine, a relaxed and intentional structure with consistency?
Good teachers set up their discipline strategies and classroom management systems long
before the first child walks through the door. Our RDS teachers are experts at this! They know
that order is a biblical principle. They understand that rules must be established to bring about a
sense of security and fairness. They realize that children are a work in progress (just as we are),
and some will be quick learners, and others will require more time. Yet, each one is made in the
image of God, valued infinitely by our Creator. A wise woman once said, “I love you too much to
let you disobey.” Out of love for the Lord and your child, our teachers help your children learn
about God’s love through their words, their instruction, their instituted rules and boundaries,
their established daily routines and practices, and their behavior requirements, as they ‘love’
them into obedience.
Just as our teachers are intentional about their mindset for teaching and structuring their
classrooms, similar principles for parenting can apply. Keeping it simple, here are three
principled mindsets . #1. Your authority to parent is given to you by God. #2. Instruction and
correction should be consistent, with an eye toward discipling. #3. Understand that to parent
well, the long view needs to be taken; that view will enable you to have perspective each day.
These will serve as review, no doubt, but we all need reminders along the way. I will expound
on #1 this week and in subsequent weeks, #2 and #3.
#1. As God’s agents of authority in the life of your child, you are correct in requiring obedience.
Ephesians 6: 1-3, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father
and mother which is the first commandment with a promise, so that it may go well with you
and that you may live long on the earth.” Children must be taught that life will go well when they
obey. When consequences for disobedience are given, life is not going well for the child. When
it’s time to discuss the offense, address the attitude behind the action. “Don’t over-talk,” says
Miss Connie.
We need a biblical understanding of authority. As your child’s parent, God has called you to be
the authority in your child’s life. You have authority to act on God’s behalf until your child is an
adult. You do not have free reign over your child to act in a manner that pleases you, but rather,
pleases God. All your training, correcting, instruction, nurturing, and disciplining is because God
has called you to this task. Teach your child the principle of being under authority. It is a biblical
concept, and one your child will live under his/her entire life.
I want to underscore that when you are rearing your child, you are God’s agent for raising a
responsible adult who loves the Lord. You don’t need to wonder if it’s okay for you to be in
charge. You are in charge, and that is by God’s design. Tell your children that God gave them
parents to be their teachers and leaders. As moms and dads, you are to have the mindset of
desiring to please God. Do you? As His representative for teaching absolutes and principles of
scripture, you are planting seeds that will, prayerfully, bring about wisdom in the life of your
child. One of the best prayers you can pray as a parent is James 1:5, “But if any of you lacks
wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be
given to him.”
Tune-in next week for an expansion of mindsets #2 and #3.
